How to Master Small Talk and Conversations in English
"How are you?" - In everyday life, whether itâs in the supermarket, at the office, or just out and about, youâve heard this greeting from native English speakers many times.
This is a simple question and you could start explaining that youâre feeling great after having been to the gym or that youâre not feeling the best because you caught a cold. This sort of reply would successfully overcome the hurdle of starting a conversation by laying down the foundation for interesting small talk.
Or was the question not meant so literally? Does "how are you?" not require a full conversation?
This supposedly easy-to-navigate conversation highlights intercultural differences and the importance of being familiar with everyday English idioms. This way, you can avoid getting stuck and can learn to navigate small talk in English calmly and safely.
English-speaking countries place a lot more value on small talk than any other country, especially in everyday life.
We will explain what you should pay attention to in English conversations and help you to master small talk in English with an overview of useful terms and idioms.
Contents:
- Understand cultural differences with English small talk
- Typical small talk situations - In passing - In the elevator - At a meeting - At a party or event - On the phone
- Avoid the pitfalls
- Practice makes perfect!
- Expressions and phrases for English small talk
Understand cultural differences with English small talk
If you start a conversation with a native English speaker, you will quickly find that English small talk is very different from maybe what youâre used to. The small talk begins in the initial greeting which is intended as a polite and frivolous pleasantry. The answer is expected to be nothing more than a simple âI'm fine, thanks.â or a âGood, how are you?â. In other cultures, these superfluous questions might not be a standard and would otherwise be responded by giving an honest answer.
The context or formality of the situation in which the small talk is taking place is generally insignificant. Addressing your counterpart in an informal manner is a standardâwhether itâs speaking with the cashier in the supermarket or meeting your new boss in the office for the first time.
However, that doesn't mean that you should converse as though you have been best friends for years. It is important to always stay friendly, polite, and avoid any controversial topics.
Politeness to a native English speaker could vary significantly from other culturesâ ways of communication.
You have set a specific goal in your headâwhy beat around the bush when you can get to the point quickly? With your English-speaking counterpart, however, itâs not well received if you simply omit the small talk and get straight to the point.
The tandem app is not just about language exchange, but also about getting an insight into different cultures and having meaningful conversations with people from all over the world. Download the tandem app now and enjoy cultural diversity!
Typical small talk situations
Small talk is not often left out of any conversation in English-speaking countries. In that case, should you always be thinking of small talk topics, even if youâre just asking the supermarket cashier for a bag?
Of course, youâre not expected to have a chat about the weather in every single situation. Let us explain how best to manage English small talk in typical situations.
In passing
When you enter a shop, stand at the checkout in the supermarket, or meet a colleague walking by in the office, small talk is limited to a few brief greetings:
In passing |
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volume_upâHi Tom, how are you?â |
volume_upâIâm fine, thanks. How are you?â |
volume_upâGood.â / volume_upâGreat, thank you.â |
If you know the person a little better (such as your colleagues), it's nice to add their first name to the greeting.
In the elevator
Sometimes situations arise in which a short greeting is not enough. If the elevator takes a little longer, for example, you shouldn't let uncomfortable silence arise. In English-speaking countries, itâs generally considered unfriendly to remain silent. You can, therefore, ask a few friendly questions, such as:
In the elevator |
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volume_upâThe weather is lovely, isn't it?â |
volume_upâDid you have a great weekend?â |
volume_upâHow is your day going?â |
At a meeting
At a business meeting, small talk in English becomes a little more detailed, after all, you do spend more time with your business partners.
If you meet your colleague for the first time, like in most countries, itâs common to greet each other with a short handshake and introduce each other. Then a few general questions can follow to help loosen up the atmosphere:
At a meeting |
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volume_upâHow was your flight?â |
volume_upâIs your hotel alright?â |
volume_upâIs this your first time in Berlin?â |
At a party or event
Have you been invited to a party or business event? In the English-speaking world, this is seen as the perfect opportunity to network and make new contacts.
Whether youâre at the buffet, the bar, or a table, itâs completely normal to approach a stranger, introduce yourself, have some small talk, and then look for new conversation partners shortly afterward.
Perhaps this seems a little superficial and intrusive, but for an English native speaker, itâs perceived as quite the oppositeâsociable and polite.
The first step is the most difficultâfinding a way to start the conversation. The best thing to do is to ask an open-ended question which helps to avoid short âYes.â or âNo.â answers. And since you are at the same event, you automatically have a few things in common that you can use to break the ice:
At a party or event |
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volume_upâHow do you know Kate?â |
volume_upâWhat did you think of Peterâs presentation?â |
volume_upâHave you tried the cheesecake? It's delicious, isn't it?â |
After a few questions, you can end the encounter with âIt was very nice to meet you, Karen!â Say goodbye and look around for a new conversation partner.
On the phone
Just because the person isnât in front of you doesn't mean that you canât engage in some small talk. During a phone call, you should briefly introduce yourself, not forgetting to ask âHow are you?â and finally adding a few nice sentences before you start talking about the real reason why you called. A conversation on the phone could look something like this:
Greeting and small talk
On the phone: Greeting |
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volume_upâHello. Tom Roberts speaking.â |
volume_upâHi Tom, this is Mateo Vasquez calling. How are you?â |
volume_upâHi Mateo, I'm good, thank you! I am enjoying the lovely weather here in Brighton. How are you?â |
Purpose of the call
On the phone: Purpose of call |
---|
volume_upâThatâs great! Iâm doing well, too. I am just calling to ask if we could talk about the email I sent you...â |
Goodbye
On the phone: Goodbye |
---|
volume_upâThank you Tom, itâs been a pleasure talking to you!â |
Avoid the pitfalls
As relaxed as English small talk may seem, there are some topics that are off-limits. These include religion, politics, and personal issues. After all, you want to create a positive atmosphere and avoid creating an awkward and unpleasant situation.
Perhaps then itâs better not to hit your British partner with a question about Brexit. This is one that could trigger a heated discussion and one that is best left out of the conversation altogether. Britons are generally positive about small talk and value relaxed but polite conversations.
However, one topic that is never off-limits to talk about is the weather. If itâs gray and rainy again outside, then the British like to complain about it. If itâs glorious and sunny out, then the British like to talk about it. Talking about the weather may sound like a clichĂ© and a major British stereotype, however, this one is very much true. So if youâre ever stuck on how to start a conversation, a comment on the weather is always a safe and reliable option.
Sticking to harmless, lighthearted topics for small talk is definitely playing it safe in English-speaking countries. In addition to the weather, topics such as sports, vacation or hobbies are also a safe bet. With this, you canât step on anyone's toes and if youâre being friendly and showing interest in the person youâre speaking with, you are guaranteed to master small talk in every situation!
Practice makes perfect!
Now that you know everything there is to know about English small talk, itâs time to put that knowledge into practice so that you are well prepared for your first English conversation. There are a few different possibilities here.
If you prefer to learn with a teacher and practice English small talk in a classroom, then a conversation course would be right for you. Different situations are practiced in a group setting, so you not only learn from your own mistakes, but also from those of other English learners.
Would you like regular personal feedback and have lessons that are tailored specifically to you? Then private lessons or tutoring will get you there faster.
If you are about to have a phone call in English, you can prepare a cheat sheet and read individual sentences from it. Your conversation partner wonât notice and it will save you from stressing out if you suddenly forget something.
Expressions and phrases for English small talk
Now that youâre ready to start preparing for your next small talk encounter in English, we have put together a PDF document with a few examples of English idioms and phrases. Download it here, practice it regularly and have it on hand to skim over before an important conversation.
Conversation starter |
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volume_upHi Tom, how are you doing? |
volume_upFine, thanks! How are you? |
volume_upHi, I don't think we have met. Iâm Kate. |
volume_upNice to meet you. |
volume_upNice to see you again. |
volume_upIâm sorry, I didn't catch your name. |
volume_upI'd like you to meet John. |
volume_upLet me introduce you to John. |
The journey |
---|
volume_upHow was your flight/trip? |
volume_upIs your hotel alright? |
volume_upIs this your first time in Berlin? |
volume_upHow do you like Berlin? |
volume_upDid you find us ok? |
The weather |
---|
volume_upWhat is the weather like in London? |
volume_upIt looks like it is going to rain. |
volume_upThe weather is lovely, isn't it? |
volume_upBeautiful day, isn't it? |
volume_upIt is a bit too warm/cold for this time of year, isn't it? |
volume_upThe weather really has been lovely those last few days, hasnÂŽt it? |
volume_upIt's quite windy. |
volume_upIt's pouring. |
Hobbies |
---|
volume_upWhat do you think about last night's basketball game? |
volume_upHave you seen this movie? I thought it was amazing! |
volume_upDo you like playing tennis? |
volume_upI hear you are a passionate tennis player? |
volume_upHave you seen the match between A and B? |
Vacation |
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volume_upDo you have any holidays coming up? |
volume_upIâve heard you were in Barcelona last week. How did you like the food there? |
volume_upI heard wildlife is fascinating in South Africa. Did you get a chance to see any animals during your trip? |
volume_upDid you try surfing/diving? |
Closing the conversation |
---|
volume_upIt was very nice to meet you. |
volume_upIt was great talking to you! |
volume_upIt was nice seeing you again. |
volume_upYou, too! |
volume_upSorry, Iâve got to go. I have a meeting/appointment at 3pm. |
volume_upTake care. |
volume_upHave a good day! |
volume_upGood luck with your new job! |
volume_upIâll call you later! |
volume_upYes, see you! |
On the phone |
---|
volume_upHi, this is Kate speaking. |
volume_upOne moment please, Iâll see if John is available. |
volume_upIâm afraid he is in a meeting at the moment. |
volume_upWhen can I reach him? |
volume_upI'm just calling to... |
volume_upMay I interrupt you for a second? |
volume_upSorry, I didn't get that. Could you repeat that please? |
volume_upThank you John, it's been a pleasure talking to you. |
volume_upThanks for your help Kate. I will see you tomorrow/speak to you soon. |
volume_upHave a nice day, goodbye! |
Tandem is a great resource for you to practice your small talk with native English speakers. Find like-minded language partners around the world and start chatting via text, audio message, and video call.
Would you prefer to meet your language partner in person? Not only can you search for suitable language exchange partners in your area on Tandem, but also in the city of your next adventure. Register on Tandem for free, choose the language(s) youâre learning and you're good to go!
With our tips and recommendations, you are more than prepared for any English conversation. So the next time youâre standing with someone in an awkward silence, you know what to do!