What Does a Successful Language Exchange Look Like?

In the ideal language exchange, both language partners gain equally by improving their skills and building their fluency. However, not all interactions are beneficial to ongoing learning. For a successful exchange, language partners typically have to have some degree of compatibility and shared interests. Here, we’ll explore how language exchanges can be structured and sustained for maximum linguistic and intercultural growth.

Create Your Profile on Language Exchange Apps

Although there are benefits to in-person meetups, the ease and accessibility of language exchange apps make them a good starting point. Apps allow you to filter potential chat partners by language, location, or interests, which increases the likelihood of you finding a compatible exchange partner.

However, before finding a language partner, you need to create a profile. A good profile is typically clear, friendly, and focused on learning. You’ll want to mention the different languages you speak and the one(s) you’d like to learn. You can also add a small biography that includes your goals, interests, and hobbies.

To increase the chances of finding a dedicated exchange partner, it’s recommended to emphasize in your profile that you’re serious about practicing the language in a polite, learning-focused tone. This sets a strong expectation that you’re committed to both learning and helping others learn.

Tips for Finding the Right Language Exchange Partners

A successful language exchange requires a certain degree of compatibility between two individuals. Experts agree that the best exchanges are between people with similar goals and interests, who decide on guidelines before they begin communicating. As Tandem’s Language Education Specialist, Michelle Kubitza, stated in a 2025 interview, “Finding a language exchange partner is like finding a friend in real life: You won’t click with everybody.” She goes on to say that it’s important not to get discouraged by this, but rather to see it as an opportunity to find people who are genuinely interested in having a conversation with you. Here are some tips for finding a language partner who will make your exchange successful:

• Highlight shared interests

  While there isn’t yet direct research linking shared hobbies to better language exchange outcomes, social science studies show that people are more likely to engage with others when they share common interests, even online strangers. This was especially notable in one study conducted by Sun and Taylor (2019), "Displaying Things in Common to Encourage Friendship Formation: A Large Randomized Field Experiment.”

  Investigations into virtual exchanges also highlight that engagement and motivation rise when learners connect through meaningful interaction, suggesting that shared interests may help sustain productive language exchanges. This was supported in research conducted by Dooly and Vinagre (2022) titled "Research into practice: Virtual exchange in language teaching and learning.”

  Mentioning a couple of your interests (travel, cooking, gaming, etc.) in your profile or first conversation can, therefore, help you find chat partners who also enjoy those topics.

• State your learning goals

  It’s also important to clarify what you want from the exchange. Do you prefer casual conversation practice? Grammar help? Are you preparing for an exam or a trip? When both language partners communicate their goals, it’s easier to support each other and ensure that you’re making the most of your time.

• Match enthusiasm and commitment

  Next, try to find a language partner whose enthusiasm and commitment level match yours. If you’re very dedicated (willing to meet regularly, come prepared with ideas, etc.), look for someone who signals the same. This can be a significant determinant in the success of your exchange. In a study conducted by Beaven, Guitérrez, and Motzo (2017), their analysis, "The language exchange programme: plugging the gap in formal learning,” indicated that a regular exchange is difficult to sustain without intrinsic motivation and self-determination. Meaning, it’s important to find an exchange partner who is as motivated and determined as you are when it comes to your overall goals.

• Be mindful of compatibility factors

  Some practical factors can affect how comfortable you feel with a language partner. These include age, gender, and language proficiency. You don’t need to practice with someone of the same gender and age, but some learners do have specific preferences, which can help them feel more comfortable during exchanges.

  Moreover, although it’s not necessary to have identical skill levels, if one person is vastly more fluent than the other in both languages, the flow might become unbalanced (one language could dominate the sessions). Tandem’s Language Education Specialist Michelle Kubitza’s advice for this is to try to stay strict and also practice the weaker language, even if it’s more exhausting and less convenient. She mentions that if you’re okay with the deviation in language level, it will get easier as you or your partner gets used to hearing and speaking it.

• Be patient and proactive

  Patience and proactivity are also paramount when just starting. You might need to message several people to find the right language partner, and sometimes you may find that some people stop responding after a conversation or two. That’s completely normal; many learners report having a few unsuccessful conversations before finding a language partner they’re compatible with.

Discuss Timing and Schedule Your Exchanges

Time management during conversations is another critical element of successful language exchange. This includes two aspects: how you divide the time within each session between the two languages and how you schedule sessions over the long term. Successful exchanges tend to include a balance that respects both language partners’ needs while maintaining strong consistency over time. These expectations should be discussed early and consist of the following discussions:

• Split the time fairly

  A cornerstone of a successful exchange involves the principle of reciprocity, meaning each language partner should get equal practice time. In practical terms, this usually means splitting your sessions 50/50 between the two languages, as this can prevent the session from slipping entirely into whichever language is easier (often the higher-level speaker’s native tongue).

  However, you don’t have to utilize this method if you and your exchange partner prefer an alternative. When asked about alternative effective equal learning structures, Michelle Kubitza, a Language Education Specialist at Tandem, recommended the following:

  • You can text/speak in one language on one day; the other language on the following day.
  • You can both text/speak in your target language for some time, offering suggestions or corrections to each other when necessary.

• Find a sustainable session length

  How long should each exchange be? There’s no single correct answer; it depends on your schedules and concentration spans. Many language partners aim for about an hour total (30 minutes per language) once or twice a week. But shorter sessions can work too, especially if they’re more frequent throughout the week.

• Meet consistently and plan ahead

  Consistency is the most crucial factor in making progress, as regular practice helps you become familiar with the language and results in fluency faster. This is reinforced by research conducted by Kim (2023) titled "Reviewing the Significance of Practice in Learning English as a Second Language: Challenges, Impacts, and Strategies.” Kim finds that the absence of consistent practice in learning a second language can have deep consequences that extend far beyond the classroom, leading to slowed progress, communication difficulties, limited opportunities, and fading motivation.

• Balance speaking and text messages

  Live speaking practice (i.e., voice/video call) is excellent practice, but sometimes schedules don’t line up for a real-time call. In such cases, be open to asynchronous practice like audio messages or texting. Just ensure that over time, both modes give equal attention to each language. If you text in your target language, encourage your exchange partner to text in theirs (your native language), so you each practice writing/reading too. And during calls, split the time as agreed. Consistency in frequency and balance in language use are the guiding principles of timing in language exchange.

Communicate on Preferences for Correcting Mistakes

One of the most significant benefits of a language exchange is getting real-time feedback from a native speaker. In a 2020 edition of the Cambridge University Press titled "Giving feedback to language learners,” feedback is described as ‘one of the most powerful influences on learning… Its three fundamental and interrelated purposes are: improving fluency, accuracy, or complexity; motivating learners; and developing learner autonomy.’

However, how corrections are delivered matters. Some people prefer immediate feedback, others prefer to have it delivered after they’ve finished speaking, or only if the mistake is repeated several times. Everyone has a different tolerance for being corrected, so it’s recommended to have this conversation early on.

For example, you might tell your language partner, “Please correct my pronunciation or any big grammar mistakes, but you don’t have to correct every time I forget a minor article.” Alternatively, you may ask, “Is it okay to interrupt, or should we note mistakes and address them after speaking?”

Some academic observations of language exchange learners show that many individuals opt to correct only when it’s essential, so as not to disrupt the flow of a conversation. This was supported in research by Canals (2024) titled, "It was like a mental Erasmus!” Perceptions of language learning and intercultural understanding in an e-tandem virtual exchange.”

However, there are several methods that you can use. Try a few out with your language partner during the first few conversations and see which ones work best for you.

• Immediate correction in speech: Briefly interrupt to give the correct word/phrase, then let the conversation continue. This works well if the mistake is straightforward (like a vocabulary slip) and you can quickly supply the right word.

• Delay and discuss: Let the person finish their thought, note down a couple of errors, then review them together after the conversation or at a pause. This approach is less disruptive and good for learners who prefer not to be interrupted mid-sentence.

• Chat corrections: If you’re on a video or voice call, use the chat box to type corrections as you talk. That way, your language partner can glance at it and incorporate the change without a big stop. It also provides a written record they can review later.

• Ask and signal: Encourage your language partner to ask for feedback as they speak, or make a signal (like raising a finger in a video call) if they want a correction on something they were unsure about.

It’s also essential to learn how to correct without overwhelming the other person, which can involve focusing on the most critical errors and phrasing corrections positively. Instead of saying, “That’s wrong,” you could say, “I understood what you meant, but there’s a more natural way to say this,” and then provide the correction. Although peer corrections can significantly improve accuracy, they should be done in a supportive environment that’s conducive to learning.

Talk About the Structure for Language Exchanges

While free-flowing conversation can be beneficial, adding a bit of structure to your language exchange sessions can accelerate learning. Many successful exchanges incorporate exercises or planned activities to focus on specific skills. Utilizing various activities can help add variety, keep conversations interesting, and target areas that unguided conversations may miss. Still, your preferences and the circumstances matter a lot, and you may have different structures for each conversation depending on the day.

• Shared reading or listening

  Pick a short article, blog post, or podcast episode in the target language before your session. Both of you read or listen to it (either in real time or beforehand), and then discuss it together. This provides fresh vocabulary and gives you something concrete to talk about beyond everyday small talk.

• Grammar or textbook exercises

  If there’s a grammar point you struggle with, ask your language partner if that’s something they’d be willing to help you with. You can bring a few example sentences or a textbook exercise you found difficult. Try to solve it together during your session.

• Themed conversations

  Choose a theme or topic (e.g., “at the restaurant”, “technology terms”, “weather expressions”) and prepare a small list of words or phrases related to that theme in your native language. During the session, teach each other those words. Then create sentences or a mini-dialogue together using the new vocab. This can help you move beyond repetitive small talk and explore new subject areas in language.

• Question of the day

  Another strategy to keep the practice going regularly is using a question of the day format. This approach involves exchanging a thought-provoking question each day (or each session) and having both exchange partners answer it in the language they are learning. Some examples of questions include:

  • “What is one tradition from your culture that you particularly love, and why?”
  • “If you won a free plane ticket to anywhere, where would you go and what’s the first thing you’d do there?”
  • “Describe your perfect weekend. What activities would you do?”
  • “Which historical figure would you like to have dinner with, and what would you ask them?”
  • “What’s something you tried to learn and failed at, and what did you learn from the failure?”

Using a variety of exercises brings balance and depth to your exchange. Free conversation is wonderful for fluency, but structured tasks ensure you don’t neglect accuracy, vocabulary growth, or specific skills. Keeping exercises interactive and relevant can help make both language partners feel like the conversation is aiding in fluency.

There’s No One Size Fits All: Embrace Trial and Error

Successful language exchanges have many common principles: reciprocity, consistency, good communication, etc. However, it’s important to recognize that there is no one-size-fits-all approach. Every learner is different, and what works for one exchange pair might not work for another.

The most important thing is to experiment and find what works best for you and your partner. Tandem’s Language Education Specialist, Michelle Kubitza, recommends starting with your time constraints and goals.

• If you have limited time but no specific learning goal → Try talking about whatever comes to mind and enjoy the spontaneous conversation developing within the given time frame.

• If you have limited time and a specific learning goal → Come prepared to your conversation, but don’t put too much pressure on your language partner, as they aren’t your teacher, and both of you should benefit from the experience.

• If you have unlimited time with no specific learning goal → Try starting the conversation and seeing where it goes naturally. You can also incorporate any of the methods for structure mentioned above.

• If you have unlimited time with a specific learning goal → Pre-determine the topics you want to learn more about, but don’t worry if the conversation takes a different direction now and then.

The most important thing is to experiment and find what works best for you and your language partner. You may discover that you keep utilizing interesting topics without even trying, which increases the likelihood that your language exchange develops into a friendship.

How to Utilize AI for a Successful Language Exchange: Tips from a Language Education Specialist

As artificial intelligence becomes more prominent in daily life, many learners are looking at ways to leverage these tools. In general, AI should be used as a complementary tool to your learning journey, not as a replacement for interacting with native speakers. According to Michelle Kubitza from Tandem, one of the best ways to use generative AI is for a brainstorming session: Whenever you run out of topics, ask AI to suggest interesting, funny, or controversial questions. You can even mention your language learning goals or interests so that the suggestions align with them.

Additional ways she suggests that you can incorporate AI into your language journey include:

• Ask AI to explain corrections when you don’t want to bother your language exchange partner too much.
• Ask AI to create related word fields, example sentences, or fill-in-the-blank texts to repeat the vocabulary you learned during your language exchange.
• Let AI create grammar exercises so that it can correct your solutions.
• If you allow AI to act as a tutor, remember that it is still a machine and lacks the personal experiences of a human being. So with the AI, you can have the language learning experience, but you're missing out on the actual exchange and the chance to make a new friend somewhere else in the world.

While these are all great tools, it’s also essential to remember that AI can still make mistakes. If there is anything you find that contradicts something your language exchange partner said, it’s best to clarify and make sure you’re not learning incorrect grammar or vocabulary usage. AI also lacks the ability to tell you about its experience traveling somewhere, living abroad, or the funniest mistake it made in its target language, simply because it’s not a real person. AI is merely a tool to support language exchange, not replace it entirely. Therefore, treat it as such and focus on taking steps to improve the success of your language exchange.